To be completely honest...my heart and mind were not in the right place for the race. I was feeling insecure and inadequate the entire week before; I really, truly doubted myself. But, as always, God carried me through. Everytime I thought about quiting or catching the metro back home, He would give me a downhill stent, a water station, friends cheering me on, or random people calling out my name...the message was the same...don't quit. I kept telling myself...you are too strong to give up...but I didn't believe it. Instead, the truth was...sometimes the best you can do is just not quit.
At mile 8, my knees started to hurt, but I could ignore it. At mile 13, I felt strong and energized!! I was pacing under 4 hours and was very encouraged by my progress. By 15, I was in severe pain. By 18, I was ready to quit. This was the moment where my mind gave up...for fifteen seconds my feet slowed and I drew closer to the metro entrance...my exit. I don't know why I kept going...I guess I just didn't know how to quit. At 19, I knew I had come too far to stop--I was practically there. (HA!!! I couldn't have been more wrong!) Mile 21 held a sweet surprise for my...my friends were in front of the Arc de Trimof screaming my name. Ok...I could do this. The next couple miles were miserable...so much pain...so much doubt...and a bit of fear. When there was 0.8 miles left to go, I set my eyes on the goal, turned off my mind, and ran. As I entered Placa Espanya (the 0.1 mile mark from the finish line), something inside me snapped. I began to pick up speed...and the plaguing pain in my knees fled...at 4hrs. 38 mins., I finished my first marathon. My time was slower than I wanted...but I did not train for the race...and the pain was so great...
I still can't believe I finished...
A HUGE thanks to God for being with me every step of the way. And to my friends, Eubee, Krystal, Jewels, Kelly, and Magnus... I could not have done it without your cheers, signs and support...you guys are the greatest!!!!
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